It’s time to stop doing the Avoid-Dance

Sep 28, 2018

Too many business owners and executives spend their time doing what I call the Avoid-Dance. This is a set of well-rehearsed moves and actions taken to step around and step away from problems.

You’re doing the Avoid-Dance any time you find ways to:

  • put off thinking about problems
  • put off doing certain tasks
  • suppress your emotions
  • distract yourself by, for example, constantly checking your phone, your email or social media
  • numb yourself with alcohol
  • comfort yourself with food

I used to do some of these things myself. But after a while I came to realize that running away from my problems was a race that I never seemed to win. Somehow or other when I ran away from my problems, they seemed to catch up with me again. Perhaps not straightaway. But, eventually, there they were again.

In my book Face It & Fix I tell the story of how I had to face up to the problems in my business eventually. And by the time I did, the problems had become bigger than before and, to make it worse, I was mentally tired from running away from them.

So I learned the hard way that it is always best to face problems head on. They’re always easier to overcome when you do that. If you face a problem when it first appears you are at your strongest and it is at its weakest. It isn’t always easy doing this of course because a problem can seem scary even when it first appears. But problems don’t go away and they’re always scarier when they come back in the future.

So if you currently run a business and you are doing the Avoid-Dance and not facing up to your problems, here’s the 3-step plan that I suggest.

  • Become Aware. As I said previously, avoidance of problems can become so habitual that we don’t even realise that we’re doing it. Set reminders on your phone for every few hours and, when the alarm goes off, ask yourself the question: “What am I doing right now?”
  • Ask Yourself. Then pose yourself this question: “Am I doing what I’m currently doing in order to distract myself and avoid facing up to a problem or a difficult task?”
  • Face It. Hiding behind what you’re avoiding is fear. So be brave and be prepared to no longer run away from what is causing you to feel bad. Things are never as bad when you face up to them. So resolve to just do it.

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